As I enter today, I realize a feeding will occur. I know as the stench is different – I nearly hurl as I walk in.
I head down to the lounge and order a triple whiskey, straight and in a rocks glass. The bartender smirks with that typical smile. She knows what’s coming. She doesn’t measure – she just dumps the whiskey into the glass until it spills over the top.
I take a huge swig – feel the burn down my throat and into my gut. I take another one – this one doesn’t burn as much, but I feel it instantly in my head and put the nearly drained glass back on the bar. When I return, it will be waiting for me – and topped off.
I head upstairs to the demon corridor – not stumbling but not walking normally either.
I go past Hate and head down to the cell of Insecurity – the largest family of them all – and everyone is getting fed – even the newly strengthened Jealousy. As I walk up to the door, they are all waiting, anticipating, even drooling. The look on the faces of Worthlessness and Reclusion shows extra expectancy.
The cell door remains locked during feedings. There is no need for me to go inside – plus I have a weapon — a six-inch knife. I never have to find it – whenever I come to feed, it is always there.
As I take off my shirt and place it on the ground near my feet, Insecurity, Worthlessness, and Reclusion stand in the front row right behind the cell’s bars while the rest stand behind. I take the knife in my right hand and place my left hand at the butt end of the handle. I set the tip of the knife into the edge of my skin on my left chest – not penetrating, but I can feel the sharpness. I close my eyes, add strength to my hands, and plunge the knife into my chest. My ribs provide little resistance. I feel the cut slice through 3 of them, first vertically against my sternum and then across to near my left arm, vertically again allowing for the ribs to be entirely cut. I remove my left hand from the knife. As I make the final incision completely loosening my ribs, they fall into my left hand. I lean over and gently place them onto my shirt.
I stand up again. Insecurity, Worthlessness, and Reclusion are leaning so hard on the bars they seem ready to break. I look at them directly, retake the knife in both hands and plunge it in the opening in my chest. I don’t just remove the heart; I also remove several inches of the significant arteries surrounding it. After the dismemberment of my heart and the surrounding arteries is complete, I put the knife in my pocket. I take both my hands and place my fingers under my heart and pull it all out. One of the arteries wasn’t severed completely – something I should be a pro at by this time – so I take the knife and cut that last dangling connection. I hold the tangled mess in my left hand and remove the arteries in three pieces and place it on my shirt. I then take my remaining heart and slice into three portions. I set the largest piece into Insecurity’s mouth – the family leader always feeds first. Next, I put the other two pieces into the mouths of Worthlessness and Reclusion. They all start to chew slowly. They have little intent of swallowing soon. The chewing provides them greater nourishment before consumption.
The others know there are next. Emptiness, Hopelessness, and the newly strengthened Jealousy come over to the bars. Each one gets artery parts. Not as nourishing, but they all gain strength.
The nourishment impacts Insecurity first. Insecurity – still chewing – squats slightly, and a massive stream of shit is relieved all over the floor. Worthlessness and Reclusion are next. The stench – shit from my heart – hits quickly and hits hard. I gag at the smell – though I have smelled it for years – smelled it for decades. The final three join the others soon enough – a full six demon chorus of shit rains down everywhere. Soon the entire floor of their cell is covered in shit – the quantity is impressive – and it doesn’t stop. The smiles on their faces are devilish and full of pleasure. Their skin and muscles shine. Their strength abounds as they shit all over their cell.
Soon after, they swallow their pieces. There is one last task – I pick up the three ribs off my shirt and place them into the mouths of Insecurity, Worthlessness, and Reclusion. These will last them for days – the marrow is their favorite. And the cell will continue to fill with shit.
I walk down to the bar, grab another whiskey, and lay on the couch. I will not sleep tonight – just lie awake listening to the Insecurity family shit all night as the stench fills the catacombs.